Patience

shotgun house new orleansGently, the sunrise slides through the maples and over the tops of shotgun houses

onto my porch where I sit on red wicker, a coffee to my left

crickets sing under coreopsis,

an over-sized cicada whacks between shotgun houses.

The distant cooing between short bursts of cars en route to work

reminds me that morning comes

that the world is hurried, but nature is long suffering

that we are quick to impress, slow to watch the sun show off

that we have answers, but the earth has good news to share every morning and we miss it

But it is this: every single day, every breath

relies on the persistence and trustworthy laboring of the earth

and the song that patience sings

 

 

 

 

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Presidents, scissors, and weenie roasts

Judgmentalism feels like someone (maybe me?) took a big needle and thread and knitted my body too tightly together. Which might be good if it were creating space for oxygen and movement in my gravity-prone body or removing the fat around my heart. But alas, not so.Kitten-Yarn
 
I need to let go of my rage about Trump being popular and my judgment toward those who support him in any way. It isn’t helping me or the world; spewing all that negative energy everywhere. But I feel such outrage and anxiety about it all. If he were anything other than a white man, he would have been done months ago. He paid off women who he took advantage of; he doesn’t know the basic principles of human well-being outside of financial success (which, btw, were at our expense – his corporations filed bankruptcy 11 times); he over-sexualizes and demeans women; he has no internal vetting device – and no regard for kindness; he bullies disabled people; he is utterly clueless about anything but the U.S. He could, with some off the cuff remark, put the world in a nuclear mess. He is the very worst of U.S. culture – arrogant, childish, selfish and an embarrassment to good men who are trying to be more evolved human beings. And that is just the beginning.
Wow! As a middle child, it feels good to be clear sometimes!
 
I’m not much of an “unfriender” — I think we should talk with those we disagree with, not demonize them or call them asshats, especially when you love those asshats. This election has brought up more rage in me than even the Reagan election and the 2nd Bush election. Now I am looking back at Reagan (who totally messed with MY Latin America) as just misinformed. And Bush as a dry drunk (which may have been true), but now in kind of a grandfatherly way. Geeez. When Jeb dropped out I thought, “Wait. What?”
Hatred and judmentalism is usually based in fear and a lack of understanding. And it is true, I do not understand Trump nor those who advocate for him. I think I get it that people want change in the political process. One friend said, “it’s time to clean out the swamp.” Agreed. All the cronyism and corruption makes me crazy too. But democracy is still arguably the “cleanest” political system we have and we are making our way through. Have you worked with some of the other countires? Or traveled and listened well enough to hear the realities? Cleaning out the swamp and then throwing in an ogre and his “F*** political correctness” minions will only create a worse mess. AM I RIGHT?
How do we make our way through this jungle?  Maybe a start is to … ignore the media for a while. They overplay everything inflammatory and make it appear larger than life. I suspect there is less extremism than we see. Let’s dissect our visceral reaction to Trump or Hillary over a glass of wine with a trusted friend or partner and get to the root of the problem. And don’t believe everything you read. national enquirer
I think I partly hate Trump because he is unreliable, unpredictable and the kind of human being I have never gotten along with (which may, come to find out, be a lot about me and my history and the stories I have told myself over the years.)  Is it that I you don’t trust Hillary because she is a political player? OK – name it. Is it that she represents the kind of feminism you don’t like? She isn’t nice enough? She is too mean? She kills babies?  Name it. And see if the real issue might be partly yours.
When you finish that, now together, let’s take a deep breath, grab a pair or scissors and cut one of those threads that binds us in our own lives and let’s start allowing ourselves to breathe better. Maybe hand someone you disagree with the scissors. Let’s imagine that we all want to make a living and have a roof over our heads, be healthy, have agency, and be close to people who love us. Maybe we go to the lake and roast weenies. And then we can return with our heads and hearts in wise mode and take this on with more patience.
That’s all I’ve got  – oh and “Love your enemies doesn’t mean you have to like them.”
man floating on a lake
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No

Don’t raise your arms .. your skirt is too short

DDT is the best insecticide

If you pray hard enough, your prayers will be answered

I like the way you look in black … it slims you

Booze is the only answer

You only have one sister

If you follow your dreams, you will suffer

You are just a farm girl, an underachiever

If you divorce, no one will ever want you

You can’t handle finances

You are selfish, following your music

Women have far more limits. Be happy you have anything

Be nice

Remember to be careful of the male ego

Quit crying; you are fine

No. No. No.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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River toes

When I am ready to give up

on love

and god

and you, dear human

I go to the mountains.

West virginia

Stepping out of my chatter in my head

and onto the earth

where my body leads me to grace

sometimes startling with

those webs of irony and humor

which

has always been my truth,

 

Do you know?

wild blueberries are red or purple

pine trees have the most sensuous bark

more contoured and sensuous than any naked body

the sky is perfect with clouds swept through

and it seems

someone painted the toes of the river

in greys and yellows and rusts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Say it: DONALD TRUMP IS A RACIST!

I hate hurting people. I hate name calling. I hate labels. You know this is true about me. But sometimes a label needs to be used. Say it with me: Donald Trump is as a racist and a sexist! And in my outrage,I  am calling on my denomination, the Presbyterian Church, USA, to join me in saying this publicly. Discrimination based on race is racism. This is not decaf discrimination. It is not racism light. It is the real thing and it is extremely dangerous. And institutions need to name it now.

I say this to my church because, like me, your stifled inward moaning and outrage is just making you ugly, anti-Christian, irrelevant, and lacking in integrity. No more nice. Gradye Parsons, our highest elected official, has made some thoughtful public statements directed to Trump himself. And it is time for the whole community to call his rhetoric what it is. Not gently. But honestly. Racism and sexism and discrimination against other groups of people is unacceptable. Trump doesn’t care, but I still believe that good people in the U.S. do care. My conscience will not let me be silent anymore. Do you want a racist-in-chief?

Trump is a Presbyterian, he claims. Presbyterians believe that our political life is something in which we are called to have Christian integrity. And as a Presbyterian, a humanitarian, an activist, a woman, and an irate sister, I say DONALD TRUMP IS A RACIST AND A SEXIST.

As my favorite New York Times columnists, Charles M. Blow, says: “we will not redefine racism” to avoid labeling Donald Trump. SAY IT! We refuse to elect a racist and a sexist There. Perhaps I can sleep tonight.

 

 

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Homesick

hummingbird

Hummingbird drizzle and the mountain birds

a crow interjects briefly, restrained

the sun is up, it’s been so since 5

I watched it through the blinds

intermittently

as I stirred again and again

listening to

the movements of my daughter in the bed above me

as i sleep on the floor

in the house

that was my home

 

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The education of one woman

“I will too go back to school!” I exclaimed to my mother after I announced I would be leaving university after my Sophomore year. Mom was, shall we say, anxious for me. She had dropped out of college at 22 to marry my dad in an era when women did that. She had always regretted having an uncompleted education. She was smart, and certainly could have finished. Her choices were complicated by a a honeymoon baby.

Needless to say, my university graduation three years later was a proud moment for me and for them. And three years after that when I received a Masters’ degree.

This week my eldest daughter will graduate from Whitworth University, a small liberal arts school in eastern Washington state. I am so proud that she will become the 2nd Parks woman to make it through the flurry of learning and social drama university grants us. It wasn’t easy. Dorm life for an impressive introvert is rough. Expectations for class performance, lack of sleep, late night conversation at a mostly conservative institution for a girl raised by her left-wing spiritual mama and her bright, always learning father who is quite happy living on the left coast certainly created some moments of clarity and questions and definition. Only a few I have been privy to. And so much more. She has made her way through with grace and determination.

And here she is. Ready to launch!

The past few years I have learned a lot about education and it’s importance on a global scale. Especially for girls and women. The barriers for girls to receive even a primary education are daunting in much of the world. Poverty, lack of birth control, war, violence in the home, cultural mores such as child marriage, trauma from rape and violence (1 in 3 women), structurally reinforced misogyny, unequal pay, are just the start. In the U.S., white women are paid 74 cents to a white male’s dollar. I just heard a statistic about NYC regarding women of color that disgusts me. The study showed that they receive around 60 cents to the dollar. 

And yet, when women divorce, which half of them do, they usually never completely recover financially while men remake the income in 3 years and then are back on track. 

In the US, a woman with a high school education will work in service jobs that keep her always fighting to make ends meet, at an enormous personal power disadvantage if she partners with a man, and less likely to develop skills that will empower her movement to create change in her way in the world.

So today, as I fly to be with my amazing daughter for her graduation, I am grateful for her determination and focus and faithfulness that allowed her to accomplish this. We do not know what is ahead in life. Life is full of challenges. This will advantage her to realize more of her potential as someone who was born to contribute to the world, her community, her family.The best is yet to be!

Congratulations Ivy!

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